Tainted torture,

mistakes long unsaid.

haunting memories,

like a hunger left unfed.

Honesty'sillusion,

nightmares haunting threw each day.

Guilty conscience,

i still mean those words i said.

overflow and dripping,

feed me with your tears.

kiss like you always,

leading me with malicious leers

a heartfelt,

liquid crystal

draining from each word.

As i hear our careless past,

our unknowns will at least be heard.

A prick to my patched heart,

a rip of yours in two.

Love breaks and heart Cries.

Yet,

i still love you!

You walk in

and everything changes,

all there is are you and i

you being the magner that evinces all feeling and thoughts of me

the desire you produce in me is inexplicable.

The beauty of your gorgeous eyes.

The strength you emit,

your humor,

your love,

all hiding behind the facade of anger and insouciency.

you tell me you want me,

all because i smile,

and if i refuse,

you leave;

walk away from me.

But how can i choose when your sole prensence

elicits the most amazing feelings of pleasure and bliss.

Your body next to mine,

your hand on mine,

your eyes on mine-

How do i control myself when you hold me and all i want to do is stay there forever

How do i control myself when you put your hand on my face

and the look in your eyes

and the words from my lips scream for me.

and yet i refuse

so what can i do then,

but sit idly by and let you slip away back into yourself

but if i do that

will you let me forget you???

im fat,
im thin,
im out,
im in,
im lost,
im found,
im up high,
im on the ground,
im safe,
im scared,
im not prepared
decend into the cold
watch my life unfold

These temporary fixations
are weakening me
into nothing,
but
a soulless encounter
and it takes all of my strenght
just to lift my head
and look into your eyes
can you see the eagerness
or are you stuck on the tears i cry?
there is this constant battle within myself,
do i dare surrender?

HAPPY NEW YEARS

well it would of been new years but i just got off work so its like an hour pass but happy new years anyways